How to respond when someone "checks in"?

 

Dear LK10 Family,

How to respond when someone "checks in"?

Connecting on a heart level is a key LK10 value.  This is so important that we do it with the Lord, with our spouses, with our children, with our CO2 (Church of Two) partners and in our church gatherings.  This is so important that it is one of the two "rhythms of attention" we teach every house church.

We are learning to use emotional words to describe to each other the condition of our souls.  (The SASHET words give us a good starting point but we are not limited to those.)  We call this "checking in" with each other.

Paul exhorts the house churches in Rome to respond to expressed emotions this way, "Weep with those who weep.  Rejoice with those who rejoice."  (Rom. 12:15)  Question:  Do you think Paul was only giving instructions on how to respond to two emotions -  weeping and rejoicing?  Or, was he articulating a larger principle?  What do you think he would advise if someone checked in as amazed? Or, anxious?  Or, furious? Or,...

In the short video below, Brene Brown explains that empathy (not sympathy) is what connects people and creates community.  This would be a great video to watch and discuss with your family and with your house church.  (Click on the link, not the photo.)  Thanks to Tony and Susie Pfarr (OH) for this video!    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Evwgu369Jw

First Question:  How would your family growing up have been different if the sharing of emotional words (ie, your heart) had been a regular and safe occurrence?  And, what if those emotional words had been met with empathy?

Second Question:  What difference would it make if there were a million house churches in the US (or, fill in your country) where people regularly connect with one another on a heart level?  Where people could talk honestly about their souls and know that they would be met with empathy?

For more by Brene Brown...  "Connection is not possible without authenticity"

http://cultureofempathy.com/References/Experts/Brene-Brown.htm

Children understand how to "check in".

What we've learned is that children of almost any age love sharing about their heart.  And, they love hearing their parents share about their hearts.  One benefit of this is that children feel they are a valued part of our church gatherings (Another important LK10 value!) because they can "check in" just like the adults.    The video below is of Ezra Kallio son of Eric and Hannah Kallio (MN).  Click on the arrow at the bottom of the video.

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Delighted to be on the journey with you!

John

John White
Team Leader
LK10:  A Community of Practice for House Church Leaders
LK10.com