Hi all,
The
body of Christ is expert in breaking fellowship over things they should
have worked through, and failed miserably at breaking fellowship for
reasons scripture actually addresses.
Knowing
when and for what reason to break fellowship is the subject today.
Loving someone in the Lord is an art, which means no 2 situations will
be exactly alike, but there are core sins the NT mentions as reasons to
break fellowship. Paul puts them together in a list in I Corinthians
5:11.
The list
"But I write to you not to keep company with anyone who is called a Christian if they are a fornicator, or greedy, or an idolater or abusive person, or a drunkard, or swindler
(dishonest in business), with people like that, don't eat nor
fellowship with." (v12-13: For what have we to do with those outside the
body of Christ? Aren't we to judge those within (the body)? But those
that are outside the body God judges. Therefore put away from yourselves
that wicked person.")
We aren't to judge motives,
but we are to judge the fruit of a person's life. I've previously
identified the sin of fornication as sex outside of marriage. The
context of Paul's writing was a man in the (house) church who had an
ongoing sexual relationship with his step-mother. All the believers knew
of it, yet no one confronted him about it, and Paul said that was
wrong, for a lifestyle of unrepented fornication is a reason to
separate.
'Greedy' -
this word literally means 'eager to have more'. Think about the
'prosperity' teaching and how greed has entered into so many churches
and the hearts of many believers, disguised as the blessing of God.
People try to mix unholy spirits of greed/lust with the Holy Spirit and
the result is erroneous teaching that appeals to the flesh and emotions
rather than stirring people to deeper growth as individuals in Christ
and developing Christ-like character.
'An idolater'.
Idol worship in Paul's time often also involved having sex with temple
prostitutes, but in general an idol is something a person is devoted
to, that comes between that person and God. Paul lists idolatry right
after greed with good reason. An idolater is someone who has elevated
something or someone as more important than God. Not the occasional
infatuation with a new car or new shoes or new friend, but someone who
as a lifestyle holds the object of their devotion as most important in
their life.
I
had a friend who was very proud of his car. One day while driving it
the Lord told him he was committing idolatry. He argued back that he had
no shrines nor statues nor did he pray to the saints. The Lord simply
replied: "You've put this car between us." He repented of pride in his
car and submitted it to Him in his heart.
'An abusive person',
which is the literal translation of the Greek. Paul doesn't define
abuse, though 'one who reviles' is often used here. This would refer to
verbal and mental/emotional abuse, with the implication that it could
involve physical abuse.
I
had to tell a man who beat his wife that he was not welcome at church.
They had 5 children and he would beat his wife so badly it would take
her nearly a month before the bruises would heal, yet neither I nor her
friends could get her to leave him, nor would he repent; She refused to
understand when he beat her he had broken the covenant of marriage as
surely as if he had slept with another woman.
We
tried to get her to go to a ministry that had a safe house, separating
for awhile in the hope of bringing him to his senses and that he might
seek counseling for his anger and abuse, but each refused. Sad, but I
was right to break fellowship with him while embracing his family who
were the victims of his violence.
'Drunkard'.
This means 'to be drunk with wine, intoxicated.' Today we would define
this as substance abuse, one who as a lifestyle or regularly gets drunk,
on drugs, etc. We must walk in love towards those seeking to overcome
such addictions and lifestyle, and the key seems to be whether these
people are making progress in Christ towards overcoming their sins, or
not. For those who call themselves Christian yet they make no effort to
judge themselves, we are to turn away from, again, because they have
refused to deal with it themselves.
'Swindler'.
This word, 'harpax' in Greek, is from the root meaning, 'to seize,
carry off by force'. In ancient times it described what we would call a
grappling hook or snagging hook that is sometimes used by fisherman. It
is the act of throwing out a hook to snag (someone) and reel them in.
Thus, swindler, dishonest in business, a liar and deceiver. When you
read of 'ravening' (wolves in sheep's clothing), it is this word.
From those who make prey of others in church, business, or life - have
no fellowship.
Again,
all these sins are practiced by people who call themselves Christians,
yet live a lifestyle or maintain habits exactly opposite all that is
called God and Godly. These are people who have hardened their heart
towards God in one particular area. They may say they love God and that
can be true in some areas, but they protect this particular sin,
refusing to judge themselves. From such Paul says break fellowship.
Weak
Christianity would say for the sake of the part of their heart that
loves God we should continue with them, but there comes a point you
become an enabler of their sin, helping them continue in that sin. The
man sleeping with his step-mother no doubt loved God in maybe 70% of his
life and heart, but it was based on the 30% he refused to repent of,
that they were to break fellowship. Paul said that sin would affect the
whole church, so for the sake of others they had to break fellowship
with the man.
Focusing
on the 70% they love God and refusing to deal with the 30% that
is potentially lethal to the their spiritual and moral lives, is like a
physically abused wife of an alcoholic refusing to protect herself
though she has been hospitalized due to her husband's beatings, because
he is a good provider when he is sober. There comes a point you have to
realize the person is using the 70% they say they love God to manipulate
you to serve as they do, their 30% sin that is ruining their (and your)
life.
But what if...
But
what if you know of someone, or work for or with someone, or are
married to someone, who fits one or more of these descriptions? What if
you love them and want to work with them to overcome one or more of
these sins? What is the point you end your involvement in their life in
this area?
Let
us look deeper into what happens after you've walked that extra mile in
love, after you've been slapped that 2nd time, after you've given your
resources but are now at a point you must protect what remains and go on
with what God has called you to do.
Balance, balance
"And
if he trespasses against you 7 times in a day, and 7 times in a day
turns back to you and says, 'I repent', you shall forgive him." Luke
17:4 Note that's immediate repentance after the sin, which means this
person is trying to overcome, and we are to respond with forgiveness in
such a case.
But
what if you are walking that extra mile with them and they exhibit
false repentance (next week's subject) and insist on continuing in their
sin, and you can walk no further? In Exodus 14:22 the Lord tells Israel
they had sinned against him 10 times (over the course of about 13
months) since they left Egypt, and He was finally going to give them
what they wanted.
Insert history lesson here: They
got to the border of the Promised Land within 13 months after leaving
Egypt. On the 10th rejection of His Word/Voice in Numbers 14:22, He
allowed them to have what they said they wanted, to die in the
wilderness, a process which took 40 years of wanderings. But the initial
journey to the border of the Promised Land was no more than 13 months.
(Covered in Exodus 14, through Numbers 14)
Israel
had hardened their heart to the Lord - remember, on the outside they
looked to be lovers of God and religious. These people made offerings
through the priests, kept the Sabbath, kept the dietary laws and
everything a good Jewish person would have done - but at each
opportunity for growth in God, they refused. That is why after 10 times,
God let them have what they wanted.
In
Steven's final words in Acts 7, he summarizes that time frame in Israel
and says in verse 42: "And God turned" (and gave them up to worship
whatever they wanted). And God turned. The word 'turn'
here, 'strepho', means "to turn the back to people" and is used to
describe what God did to Israel after their 10th time in 13 months of
unrepentant sin.
If
you read Numbers 14:40-45, it was only AFTER that 10th time, AFTER God
turned His back on them to give them what they wanted, that they
'repented'. And still, His decision was firm, He did not change His
mind. That is the hard part when we love someone, to get to the point we
can go no further, then have them cry and beg us to take them back, to
let them live at home, to just help them out '1 more time'. But once the
Lord had turned, He turned, and let them suffer the consequences of
their sin.
How
do we know the difference between genuine repentance and false
repentance so that we can make such a decision? That's next week. Until
then...(and remember to email me at cwowi@aol.com).
Blessings,
John Fenn
www.cwowi.org and email me at cwowi@aol.com
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